Ever wonder if you’d survive the zombie apocalypse? Even the cast of smash hit “The Last of Us” have their doubts.
Ahead of the show’s much anticipated Season 2 premiere Sunday on Crave, we asked five people — “The Last of Us” video-game co-creator and co-showrunner Neil Druckmann; Season 2 writer Halley Gross; actors Kaitlyn Dever (who plays Abby), Isabela Merced (Dina) and Young Mazino (Jesse) — to spill their guts on what survival skills they’re lacking.
Luckily, we had some Toronto pros on hand to offer their expertise — maybe you can crib a tip or two to help you evade any mushroom-covered monsters in the future.
Halley’s Survival Fail
“I have no capacity physically at all. I am a pocket-sized little alien-shaped person. You could put me in a suitcase. I am not useful for fighting.”
The expert: Shawn Zirger, Zirger Academy of Martial Arts
The tips
1) You want some armour: bites will have a lot of trouble getting through coarse nylon or leather. It’s going to be hot, but it will stop the bite. Most important is not to be in grappling range at all. They don’t feel or react to pain, so there isn’t much you will do in hand-to-hand combat, so stay at range, using long-range weapons with strong penetrating or excellent dismembering properties.
2) The safest approach may well be a double or single leg tackle, using your hands to pin the heels to the ground while driving the knees backward with your shoulders. Do not follow the beast down; rather, immediately lift its feet, isolate a leg and, using your own knee as a fulcrum, pivot around to the front of the knee and pull the foot until the knee snaps backward. Remember: you need to stay away from the arms, so you have next to no time to execute this manoeuvre. If you succeed, it will be significantly slowed so you might be able to escape, or you may have to repeat this technique on each limb until it is slowed enough for you to stomp its head.
3) Weapons-wise, fire is good, so learn to make a Molotov cocktail. Small-calibre firearms are very risky; head shots are hard to make under stress and that is what it takes. Also, it will attract other infected to the area. Silent, powerful weapons with reliable accuracy will be the safest choice, like bows and crossbows.
4) Combat is all about the ambush. Always be on the lookout for favourable and unfavourable ambush terrain. These will be the places that you or, conversely, your rivals will have the strongest chance of success and survival. Any other form of attack is extremely risky. Look for bottlenecks in the terrain: areas that force the use of a singular narrow path. These are valuable fallback positions when you need to retreat as they will funnel your targets into narrow fields of fire, increasing your ability to use firearms or Molotovs or, in the worst-case situations, will allow you to fight your enemies one at a time in melee.
Neil’s Survival Fail
“I can’t fight. I can’t fix a car. I don’t know how to siphon gas. I don’t know how to farm. Like, anything useful in the apocalypse I don’t know how to do. I know kind of a little bit enough just to write about it, but I don’t know how to actually do it. I can run pretty fast but not for a very extended period of time. So, if there is a way I could just run and lock a door, maybe I’d have a chance at survival. Otherwise, I’m one of the first people to go.”
The expert: Rui Silvestre, My Neighbourhood Mechanic
The tips
1) “Three common things that can take your car off the road are low or degraded fluids, weak batteries, and worn or damaged tires. Before venturing into the apocalypse, perform these simple checks:
• Check tire pressure and inspect for visible wear or damage.
• Pop the hood and inspect all fluid levels; top up or investigate if anything looks unusually low. Even in a world turned upside down, clean and full fluids are crucial for the smooth running of your car.
• To keep your battery charged, occasionally run the car for about 30 minutes if you’re not regularly driving, at least once every week.
2) Regular scavenging for parts from identical vehicles is critical! Remember: “two is one and one is none.”
3) Visibility is key when cruising around, so don’t forget to keep that washer fluid topped up! In summer, a little 50/50 mix of water and vinegar does wonders, but be careful! When the Canadian winter hits and temperatures dip below freezing, you’ll want something stronger to keep things clear: 50/50 water and rubbing alcohol works.
Kaitlyn’s and Isabela’s Survival Fails
Kaitlyn: “Fighting off a clicker (zombie) seems pretty daunting. Maybe not being so terrified by the look of the clicker is what I’d be not good at.”
Isabela: “I’d be really, really bad at the manual labour. Not that I’m bad at it. I’m actually quite strong. I’m just lazy.”
The expert: Rachel Summers, mental health and addictions counsellor
The tips
For fear management: “Many people cope with fear and anxiety through avoidance. Avoidance can provide short-term relief but lead to increased anxiety and distress over time. Instead of avoiding, gradually exposing yourself to what you fear in small, bite-size steps is a way to build your confidence and increase your level of comfort with the stimulus.”
For doing hard things: “Managing expectations of yourself and being mindful of your negative inner critic that can make an already daunting task seem simply unsurmountable. The quest for perfection can derail the highest of hopes, so manage your expectations and break tasks down into small, manageable pieces. Things being hard or difficult does not mean you should not or cannot do them. Things being hard or difficult is a necessary obstacle in life, and it is what we do to manage our own discomfort with difficulty that will dictate our growth — or surviving the zombie apocalypse.”
Young’s Survival Fail
“I’d probably be terrible at harvesting. I don’t know too much about farming. I don’t know how green my thumb is. Maybe a little brown or something.”
The expert: Jessey Njau, Zawadi Farm
The tips
1) In a mushroom-zombie apocalypse, you’ll want quick-growing crops that don’t need a lot of attention, like fast-maturing leafy greens like kale, spinach and microgreens. You can grow them indoors or in greenhouses. They offer high nutritional value even if space is limited. Root vegetables such as radishes and carrots are also excellent because they’re hardy and easy to manage; potatoes and beets are excellent quick-grab options as they store exceptionally well in dry, cool places.
2) In these challenging times, good soil smells reminiscent of the forest and fresh rain. It is dark and easy to plant in. If you notice tiny white threads in the soil, that’s a good sign — these threads indicate the presence of beneficial fungi, specifically the visible white threads of mycelium. Despite the fungal-based threats outside, healthy fungal networks in the soil are your allies, as they help plants absorb nutrients and resist disease. Avoid barren or smelly, contaminated soil and consider growing indoors using compost-rich mixtures.
The tools:
• Hand trowel: For quick defence, planting and transplanting.
• Hoe: Great for creating a defence parameter, preparing soil and controlling weeds.
• Sharp knife or pruning shears: For rapid harvesting and essential protection from contamination.
• Durable gloves: Vital for protection from contamination by zombie spores and infected soil.
• Greenhouse materials: Use transparent plastic or glass to build passive solar greenhouses. These use sunlight to maintain ideal growing temperatures and extend growing seasons safely indoors.
3) Start by cultivating your food indoors or in secure greenhouses. Keep your garden discreet and low-profile. Save your food scraps to create healthy soil, which helps your plants thrive (it’s essential to save your seeds!). By protecting your valuable soil and practising careful gardening, you can ensure your safety from potential threats, such as zombies, while also growing a sufficient supply of food!
4) Black garlic, garlic preserved in honey, and dried beans or peas are also excellent choices, offering long-term nutrition, medicine and easy transport. Consider pickling, canning and cold storage methods to extend vegetables’ shelf life significantly.
