For Roy Murnaghan, a gay teen who grew up in a small town in Prince Edward Island, social media was a treasured escape.
It was a place where the 19-year-old University of Toronto student could find comfort while scrolling silly videos and memes, but also connect with LGBTQ influencers and communities where he felt reflected and seen.
But these days, he said, it sometimes feels more like a hellscape.
He said he frequently comes across videos, especially on Twitter and TikTok, from right-wing influencers blaming societal challenges on women, LGBTQ folks and immigrants, with some commentary crossing into hate speech.
“Finding this community where it was people who were like me, and I could relate to, it was so powerful,” he said. “It’s kind of frustrating having that kind of taken away from you.”
While he takes an interest in progressive politics, he finds it perplexing that he frequently comes across videos by figures such as Andrew Tate and Charlie Kirk, who have been linked to the “manosphere” — a loose collection of influencers and online communities who promote male supremacy, misogyny and blame women and feminism for much of society’s problems.
“That’s not at all anything I’ve ever liked,” Murnaghan said. “So it’s like, why is that on my ‘For you’ page?”
The main theme of the manosphere is that society is structured against men’s rights and well-being and is actively working against them, while ignoring the fact that most positions of power and privilege are still held by men. Still, the narrative is resonating with some boys and men who feel disenfranchised and disconnected from society. A 2023 study found that 84 per cent of boys age 13-15 are familiar with Tate — arguably the most infamous person associated with the manosphere — and that one-quarter agreed with his views.
Tate has many videos aimed at young men instructing them on how to make money, get ahead in life and “Escape the Matrix,” which is where he’s found the most success. But he’s also repeatedly said a woman’s “value” is determined by her age, appearance and fertility. He has referred to women as “barely sentient.”
Murnaghan said it feels like social media companies and right-wing influencers (by promoting their content to specific demographics) are targeting youth exploring videos about mental health, or even just watching streamers in the gaming community — youth who are often vulnerable, isolated and desperate for a sense of belonging.
“I definitely think that, especially for young boys who are very susceptible to that messaging, I absolutely think they’re being targeted.”
While the manosphere is typically linked to misogyny, some of the same influencers cross into a constellation of hate that targets immigrants, the LGBTQ community and also men who don’t fit into the traditional concept of masculinity. Males deemed not “manly” enough are called “cucks,” “beta males” and “simps” — a term for men who try too hard to impress romantic interests.
Women and girls are often questioned about their “body count,” or how many men they have been intimate with, or labelled with a string of numbers that, when flipped upside down, resembles a derogatory term for sex workers or women perceived as promiscuous.
Among conservatives, there’s been a wider societal backlash, which many young people have embraced, against concepts such as “wokeism”— which Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre railed against — “toxic masculinity” and Critical Race Theory. Movements such as #MeToo and Black Lives Matter have left some boys and men feeling like their own hardships have been dismissed.
“What we’re hearing from young men and boys is this feeling of being unheard,” said Sharif Mahdy, chief executive officer of The Students Commission of Canada, an organization that works with youth to amplify their voices and foster healthy conversations.
“There’s a deep perception, and it’s being reinforced in the manosphere, that men are being pushed out of society.”
But he added society is not creating spaces for young boys and men to express those feelings, even if they’re misplaced.
“The response from a bunch of left-leaning youth in the room is to just say that’s wrong,” he said. “And all that does is just push them further down that path.”
At a recent conference held by the Students Commission , youth who spoke to the Star said misogynistic content proliferates online, spreading messages about how women “should stay in the kitchen” and not enter the workforce.
Emma, 17, from P.E.I., who didn’t want her last name used to protect herself online, said she’s exhausted by all the misogynistic content she encounters online.
“There’s a lot of toxicity towards women for no reason,” she said, referencing a backlash against the movie “Barbie,” which some conservative commentators called “anti-men.” She said around topics such as abortion rights, there’s always a flood of men who feel the need to chime in.
“I feel like whenever women or minority groups are the topic of discussion, they feel threatened … it’s not about them anymore, and they need to make it about them.”
Dimitri Pavlounis, a research director at CIVIX, an organization that works with teachers and schools to promote media literacy and combat misinformation, said members have been hearing of a “huge rise in kind of misogynistic rhetoric at schools” — including students telling female teachers to go make them a sandwich.
Pavlounis said while those grievances are misguided, it doesn’t help to simply dismiss these sentiments, “because they will then look for somebody who will validate those feelings.”
Most of the experts who spoke to the Star said they believe it’s indeed more challenging in modern society for men and boys, but that also applies to young people more broadly.
Many young men and boys grew up being told they can go to school, acquire a degree, start a career, and have a family and house with a white picket fence waiting for them, said Amarnath Amarasingam, an extremism expert and assistant professor at Queen’s University.
“What’s happening now is that all of that is postponed,” he said. “I think it’s creating a little bit of a collapse of trust and a sense of dislocation from what they thought they were working towards … and what now seems out of reach.”
There are legitimate, non-conspiratorial, socio-economic challenges that have made it more difficult for young people to succeed, such as the housing and affordability crises. It’s believed to be a reason that polls were suggesting that young men were flocking to the Conservative party in large numbers in the recent federal election.
But instead of blaming government policies or global upheavals in recent years, far-right influencers are blaming society’s problems on traditionally marginalized groups, Amarasingam said.
They say “it’s not you personally … but it’s actually a group of people who are to blame, who are actively trying to keep you oppressed,” he said.
This can lead youth down a rabbit hole, driven by social media platforms and algorithms for suggested content, Amarasingam said.
One day, a youth might be watching a video expressing genuine concern about how some men feel they’re struggling in society.
Before they know it, they’re seeing videos by mainstream figures such as Joe Rogan, Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson, who have been associated with the manosphere, but tend to express their views in more articulate and palatable ways. That can quickly lead down a path to more extreme, hateful content.
“The algorithm will do the job … Before you know it, your entire feed is just manosphere, far-right stuff,” Amarasingam said.
He compared it to the “frog in boiling water scenario.”
“You don’t actually know that you’re in these spaces, necessarily, until the water is boiling.”
Alexander Makeykin, a 19-year-old from Saskatchewan who moved here from Ukraine during the war, said there’s no doubt in his mind that women are being prioritized in society.
“As a man, I feel left behind,” he said. “Because (when) I read news, it’s all about minorities, it’s all about women.”
He added that he also finds it odd how prominent Pride flags are in Canada, which he says was not the case in his country and makes him believe minority and historically marginalized groups are prioritized in Canada.
He said he doesn’t believe he has white privilege, particularly as an immigrant who escaped a war, while adding that he’s doing well for himself; after two years in Canada, he co-owns a house with his father and has two vehicles.
Makeykin provided several examples for why he believes women now have the upper hand in society. He referenced a Google pay equity analysis that found the company was underpaying some men. While that was true, it was primarily for one group of software engineers.
He added that he believes dating apps are skewed toward women, and that expectations placed on men are unfair.
“I’ve seen a lot of videos of women being asked, ‘What are your expectations for a husband?’ ” he said. “And all of them name six-figure salary, very tall, very cute, very nice.
“When a man is looking for a woman and wants her to be skinny, that’s offensive and that’s sexist,” he added. “But when a woman wants a man to be tall, it’s not sexist.”
He said he’s been looking at the “Passport Bros” movement, a trend that started on TikTok and YouTube about men in the western world moving to developing countries to marry women with more “traditional” values.
“I’ll just go back to Ukraine and I’ll find someone who will respect me … and will not tell me every day that I’m a predator or a white supremacist or oppressionist.”
Makeykin said he hasn’t found any kinship among his peers and has retreated to platforms such as Discord and Minecraft to find like-minded individuals.
“We actually are moving from a different (Minecraft) server, because moderation there is very biased towards women and trans people,” he said.
Online platforms have become a refuge for some boys and young men who hold views that would be considered unacceptable in mainstream society, Amarasingam said.
Amarasingam, who authored a paper called “Belonging is Just a Click Away” that looks at the role of extremism and radicalization in online communities, said the internet was once a place where young people could escape themselves — roleplaying as a video game character, for example.
But now, for many young boys and men, the opposite is true.
“It’s in their real life where they’re pretending and where they’re holding a fake and manufactured identity, but they’re more real and authentic online,” he said.
“What the online provides … is a much more transnational sense of being, of being part of a movement — a movement that’s outcasted in real life.”
Ghayda Hassan, a professor of clinical psychology at the University of Quebec in Montreal and the director of the Canadian Practitioners Network for the Prevention of Radicalization and Extremist Violence, said in the past, divisive political discourse such as identity politics was typically focused on people of voting age.
“The problem that we are facing is that these different narratives and groups are targeting younger and younger audiences.”
She said while global economic challenges are a real concern, she also points to an “echo chamber of negative content, around economic crises, political crises, environmental crises,” which have created a sense of hopelessness among some youth, especially boys.
“The reigning discourse is a discourse that counters youth’s natural propensity for hope and wanting to change the future,” she said.
There are risk factors and protective factors (characteristics that reduce the risk of negative outcomes) for youth who embrace extreme and hateful views. Protective factors include family support, a pro-social peer network, and healthy (offline) relationships — or in a word, connection.
“Risk factors are youth who have experienced distress in their developmental history, characterized by interpersonal violence, isolation, and a youth who’s looking for belonging,” she added.
Joanna Conrad, executive director of the Essex County Youth Diversion program in Windsor, which helps deradicalize youth, said they’ve seen a lot of boys who are “anti-women” in recent years. The common thread is a feeling of alienation and lack of purpose.
“We find that the boys, specifically that we’ve had come through, do have some social anxiety issues. Maybe they don’t have a ton of friends. Maybe they’re not overly involved in extracurricular activities,” or are experiencing a divorce at home or other type of trauma.
She said it’s critical for parents to have proactive conversations with their kids about questionable content they’re consuming online, even if it’s uncomfortable. It can be as simple as asking questions, in a non-judgmental way, such as how does this message resonate with you? And why does it make you feel heard?
“Either you want to be the number one educator, or you want the online world to be,” she said. “Because they will get their information elsewhere. And it’s probably not the information you want them to get.”
