Restaurateur Jen Agg is currently eating solo at a lauded seafood spot in New York — something she does regularly, whether at home in Toronto or while travelling. “I’m here for seven dinners,” she says, “and I will eat five of them by myself quite happily, on a date with the restaurants.”
When I put out a call asking people about their solo dining habits, I heard about ramen joints, greasy spoons and cosy neighbourhood spots where eating alone feels normal. A few people also mentioned Agg’s restaurants — such as Le Swan, General Public and Bar Vendetta — for their inviting design, thoughtful service and the option to order half portions.
As dining out alone becomes more common (solo reservations in Toronto were up 17 per cent last year, according to OpenTable) Agg brings a unique perspective: she’s both a regular solo diner and a restaurant owner who’s thought a lot about how to make solo guests feel welcome.
Here, she shares her most memorable experiences, her biggest pet peeves (like oversized portions), and what she wishes more diners knew about going out on their own.
How often do you eat by yourself, whether in Toronto or when travelling?
Often! At least once a week in Toronto. And I am answering these questions solo dining at Penny in New York at the moment.
Were you always comfortable with eating by yourself?
Yes. While I can’t relate, I understand that some people feel a little uncomfortable dining alone. I think they should get over it. The more comfortable people are in their own skin the better off we will be as a culture. That GOOD confidence.
Are there any occasions when dining by yourself is better than going with another person?
Many. Like when I’m writing, I need a lot of alone time. I might take notes, dictating quietly like the old lady I am. Or I might just start thinking about something I want to work on the next day. But outside of that, if you’re at a place where the staff is awesome, it can just be such a wonderful experience. I genuinely believe we make our own experiences (for the most part).
Are there any places in the city that really optimized the solo dining experience?
I enjoy solo dining at Imanishi quite a lot. I love all the staff there. (Co-owner) Shori Imanishi’s kitchen is incredibly consistent, which is a huge achievement.
People hesitant to dine alone will say they’re worried their servers will judge them, or that they’ll be seated at the worst table because they’re taking up space or not spending as much as a couple would. What would you say, as a restaurant owner?
I think that’s a pretty outdated attitude — but obviously, I realize lots of the dining public still have outdated ideas about how restaurants operate. I promise, the servers are not judging you for dining alone. At all. They do not care. They just want you to be nice and treat them like human beings (it’s a low bar).
And I think the spending concern can be easily solved by offering smaller versions of dishes whenever possible. People will order more things, and even if they’re paying a little more than half the price of a couple’s bill, you’ll end up with a higher guest check. There’s also data to support that solo diners tend to spend more than half of what a couple does.
Do your restaurants offer half-portions?
Yes — not for everything, but for many things.
Have you noticed an increase in solo diners at your restaurants over the years?
I think maybe anecdotally I can say yes.
A few solo diners mentioned eating at the bar at your restaurants. What makes a good bar setup?
I personally love eating at the bar, either as a solo diner or with my husband or a friend. If you’re charging a certain amount of money, you simply can’t ask people to sit on really uncomfortable barstools.
Comfortable barstools take up more space, which affects how much money a restaurant can make, so there’s a lot to consider when designing a great bar. To me, the bar should be inviting and radiate warmth. I really hate a cold, clinical bar setup — so lighting is a factor as well. I could go on and on about this.
If you see someone eating by themselves at one of your restaurants, do you engage with them differently?
It’s all led by the diner. It’s totally a personality thing. The best servers and bartenders we have are basically psychologists — able to give people what they want, and for bonus points, what they didn’t even realize they wanted.
To end: any advice for people who are scared to dine out on their own?
I can’t promise every restaurant will guarantee a good time for every single (single) diner, but I can guarantee that we all make our own good time.
This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.
