When Maggie Hildebrand moved to Toronto in March 2024 after graduating from the University of Moncton, she was ready to make new friends. But despite trying workout classes, local events and Bumble BFF, she often felt like everyone she met already had somewhere else to be — and someone to be with. Within a year, she was lonelier than ever.
Hildebrand posted a TikTok asking if other women in the city felt the same. The responses — comments and direct messages — started flooding in. She planned a picnic in High Park to meet them. Realizing the potential of these gatherings, she launched Connection Collective, a social group for women looking to build community in Toronto.
“Toronto gives you endless options for restaurants, events and careers,” Hildebrand says. But she found the city’s hustle culture extended to every aspect of her life, except her social life. “And yet connection is just as essential as health and success.”
Now, Connection Collective has over 2,000 followers on Instagram and hosts events for 60 to 80 attendees twice a month.
Hildebrand’s experience is not unusual. A 2023 Toronto Foundation report named Toronto Canada’s loneliest city, and research from Dalhousie University shows that isolation is widespread in Canada. Clearly, there’s a hunger for connection in the city.
One of the closest friends Hildebrand has made through Connection Collective is Maria Burch, who runs her own wellness club. “From the start, we had so much in common, especially in how we see community, and our friendship has become this mix of personal and creative support,” Hildebrand says. “She shows up to almost every event, and we constantly encourage each other by sharing posts and bouncing ideas. It’s rare to find someone who really gets it, and she’s become that for me.”
Hildebrand has also made plans with other women from the group — long walks, coffee dates — and hopes to host a dinner party for some of the closer friends she’s met through it. “I’d love to bring them together in one space and close that circle,” she says.
In recent years, other women’s social groups have popped up across the city. Toronto Girl Collective, Toronto Girl Social, City Girls Social Club, Ladies’ Food Club, and Girlies in the 6ix are just a few of them. They organize activities like pottery nights, yoga classes, speaker panels and other events with one main goal: building friendships. While they tend to attract women in their 20s and 30s, many welcome women up to their 70s.
Vindhya Kolluru, a 28-year-old journalist, joined Toronto Girlies in 2023. Two years later, some of the women she met through the group are among her closest friends; she’s about to attend one member’s engagement ceremony.
“I like that people are being more intentional about the friendships they’re building,” Kolluru says. “In a big city like Toronto, although there are millions of people, it’s hard to create deep connections. Having that aspect of intentionality encourages people to invest their time and presence more diligently as they know they hold common goals and interests.”
While activity-based groups like run clubs and book clubs are also growing in the city, users see the need for groups focused solely on friendship. ”(Activity-based) groups are great, but the focus tends to be more about the activity itself,” says Sandhya Ravichandar, a 29-year-old dog walker who joined Connection Collective this summer. “With friendship-focused groups, everyone is there for the same reason: to connect. It makes the environment feel more wholesome and open.”
Danielle Bayard Jackson, a Florida-based friendship coach and author, says groups like these are popping up in cities across North America. Even people who already have friends benefit, because research shows that having friends from different parts of your life — like work, hobbies, or community — makes you happier and healthier than relying on just one group of friends.
Bayard Jackson says the groups are a great way to make friends, provided you understand your own friendship goals and that the group aligns with them. She also stresses the importance of continuing to make friends the old-fashioned way. “If you’re only going to the other side of town to find friends, you’re overlooking opportunities for people who live close by,” she says. “One benefit of meeting people out in the wild — neighbours, coworkers, and people at church — is that close proximity increases the chances you’ll become friends, simply because you’ll clock more hours together.”
Demographic-specific friendship groups can also offer a much-needed sense of belonging. “If you’re from a specific marginalized group and you don’t have any friends from that group in close proximity, it’s good to find groups that exist according to a certain set of values to offer safety, understanding, and affirmation for your various intersectional identities and interests,” she says. In the GTA, Gyallivant caters to Black women, and Brown Girls Thriving caters to South Asian women.
For some groups, the goal is about more than just making friends; it’s about shifting attitudes. “We’ve gathered feedback from community members who have shared that since joining, they feel more confident in their social skills, an increased sense of home since moving to the city, and more prepared to navigate their journey of making new friends,” says City Girls Social Club’s founder, Stephanie Sim.
While the concept of curating friendships may seem unnatural to some, Hildebrand sees it as a cultural shift for the better. “During childhood, friendships are incidental and based on circumstance. For adults in a fast-paced city like Toronto, belonging takes effort, and that effort is a reflection of care,” she says. “It’s about building the kind of community you actually want to live in. In a culture that often leaves adults to figure out friendship alone, I think that is something really special.”
